A couple nights ago, I was thinking, I just want to go and get this trip over with as fast as I can!. And that thought surprised me. A lot. This trip, which is more apparent to me than anybody else, is one of the biggest milestones (if that is even the proper term) I will have accomplished in my life! Yet, this reaction made me wonder, what am I really feeling here? Nervousness? Obviously. But what made me want to "get this trip over with"? I think the big obstacle that currently stands in my way, is fear. Simply fear. Well, not simply. Some of these fears I have come to recognize even as I am writing this. Maybe, I am scared that I will not treat my family the same when I come back to the States, for what I will have experienced will have changed me greatly.

But I think, in fact, I know that what I fear most, is not knowing what I am going to experience, what I'm going to feel. Only stepping off that plane will then I know.